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[5055034455]

№ 150



❝ This is Saul Goodman. Leave a message. ❞

Comments

[text]

[legal_eagle]

Fuck everything, Goodman; they are all SO FUCKING STUPID.

[5055034455]

I KNOW.

Did they think it'd be perfect right out of the gate? Are they that delusional???

[legal_eagle]

Also fucking "Well it will divide us from the Exiles"
ARE YOU FUCKING DEFECTIVE MENTALLY; NO IT WILL NOT. Fucking RE-PAVED ROADS AND SCHOOL SERVICES DO NOT MAKE FOR A FRACTURED SOCIETY.

[5055034455]

BUT SONYA!

WHAT IF WE UPSET THE INITIATIVE AND THE EXILES? :(

Not that I was going to come out and just say oh right by the way the Initiative gave me what passes for their blessing so maybe you should all bear that in mind before you flip your shit.

Except maybe I should have.

Or maybe I should have pointed out that maybe part of the reason why the Exiles don't take us seriously in the first place is because we're disorganized as fuck.

Also: Sollux is a problem.

sorry for all the text

[legal_eagle]

It's okay; it just gives me more "i"s to draw hearts on.

And yeah, he's a fucking problem-- wait, no, he's GOT a fucking problem, PERSONALITY-WISE.

Normally I wouldn't be committing this shit to text, because it'd look bad if someone hacked my phone, but tbh I SORT OF WANT ALL OF THIS TO GO PUBLIC SO ALL YOU ASSHOLES KNOW THAT I AM FED UP WITH YOUR DESIRE TO MAKE UP BULLSHIT EXCUSES TO COVER FOR YOUR PETTY FUCKING NEED TO SUPPRESS CHANGE BECAUSE YOU ARE SCARED.

xoxo
Sofiya Mehrzadevna Karimova, American fucking citizen

[5055034455]

Your full name is so pretty. ♥

This would all have been fine if our resident Senator hadn't gone stirring up shit so eloquently. It's always the nice ones, isn't it?

[legal_eagle]

That's my Soviet name, actually, who I would have been if we stayed back in the old repressive regime. But you're so pretty. ♥

And absolutely; the nice ones are usually the dumb ones.

[5055034455]

I had such high hopes for her. I think she has some valid points, I just wish she could have, idk, kept them to herself until the meeting WHERE PEOPLE WITH EXPERIENCE IN THIS FIELD CAN HAVE A RATIONAL DISCUSSION, MAYBE.

but what do I know

[legal_eagle]

OK, so we don't trust her. Next.

[5055034455]

Helena Bertinelli. You know her?

[legal_eagle]

Next

[5055034455]

OK, the thing is that I really want to agree with you but I think she could be useful if she's on our side. She contacted me the other day with a list of "conditions" for working with us — I think if we meet them (or at least appear to) and she throws her support behind this venture, we'll have a big advantage.

[legal_eagle]

The first time I talked to her, she spilled ALL HER DADDY ISSUES. Noooo thank you.

[5055034455]

She's from Gotham. They all have issues.

[legal_eagle]

Then pass on all of them. This is going to be bad enough without CEASELESS WHINING.

[5055034455]

I'm not passing on Barbara Gordon. And I don't think we'll get her without Helena.

If my suspicions are right, Helena's more than capable of keeping it professional. She might have to be in kevlar and a cowl to do it, but...

Then again, my default assumption is that everyone from Gotham that's wound up here is a vigilante, soooo I could be way off.

But there's no way in hell she's just a high school teacher.

[legal_eagle]

What the fuck are you going on about right now?

[5055034455]

Gotham's big on vigilante justice. I have no proof that she or Barbara etc. etc. are running around in costume saving the day, but I have a feeling.

That's why we need them.

[legal_eagle]

OK why would they need costumes?

[5055034455]

To protect their identities?

Also because they're cool?

[legal_eagle]

Oh, sure, to protect their identities
Because they're breaking the law
Yeah?

[5055034455]

I think it's frowned upon by the authorities in their world, but it's also rampant and useful enough that nothing's really done about it.

[legal_eagle]

Fine. I'm fucking on board for recruiting them, then.

[5055034455]

Great. As for Helena's conditions:

1) attendance at all meetings
2) access to records & paperwork
3) treated as an equal, not a subordinate
4) the setup of a formal training system for those interested in participating but no experience

Doable, I think, considering 1) attendance will be encouraged, 2) the only actual paperwork I will want to deal with = meeting minutes, 3) I'm happy to humor her, and 4) every good government needs interns.

[legal_eagle]

1. fine, 2. fine, 3. spare me but fine, 4. fine, but I don't want to have a bunch of teenage idiots trailing me around